Word Choice: Abstract vs. Concrete Language (Brianna and Tiffany)

1. The soldier warmly embraced his children for the first time after spending six strenuous months in Iraq. Glee was plastered over the span of all their faces; smiles expanding for ear to ear. As the children barreled towards their father, the dedicated soldier cried out a wail of happiness; he had finally reached the moment he had been yearning for.

2. She tightly gripped the gun, hands shaking. The man across of her smirked mischievously, toying with her. "Where's my daughter?" she demanded forcefully. Silence ensued as the man wiggled in his chains. He then looked up slowly, smiling devilishly. "That' for me to know and for you to find out," he snapped. With sweaty palms and shaking hands, she set the gun down on the table. As she glared at the man for the last time, she clicked the button and bolted out of the trailer. The man went up in smoke. 

3. As the competition came to an end, the seconds seemed infinite. My palms sweaty and heart racing, I waited impatiently for the announcers to declare the winner. I had a slight anticipation I was going to win; my competitors acted with great temerity while playing. The static of the mic burst through the silence. The world was a blur as our names were announced for everyone to hear. We had won at last.

Ball Pit: 

My eyes widened as they scanned over the explosion of color before me. Patches of blue, red, yellow, and green could be found anywhere and everywhere in my field of vision. Without hesitation, I dove straight in to the various hues and shades of color. I felt like a little kid; unlimited energy with the feeling of exploration coursing through my veins. Emerging from the ball pit, my eyes locked onto the bright orange stairs that led up to the sky blue slide. I quickly scrambled up the stairs, stumbling over step after step. Reaching the top, I felt accomplished and proud. I sat down and gripped the handlebar above the opening of the slide and sat down clumsily. Taking a deep breath, I pushed off and let go of the bar and all the maturity I currently had, letting myself transform into the carefree child I once was.

Roller coaster:

Iron bars perfectly organized to create a colossal 400 foot roller coaster. Each individual component, perfectly placed to create a contraption that would provide entertainment and induce awe. Coats of the colors of bright autumn pumpkins served as the exterior of the attraction, making it contrast so beautifully against the baby blue skies. It spun around itself, and twisted itself into several variations; like a skilled contortionist at the Cirque Du Soleil. Quite the spectacle, it caught many daring souls that sought adventure.